Love/Loss

I'm feeling so far away from my faith.

I just don't see how all these things, deaths, keep happening with a loving God watching over us.

It doesn't make sense.

I'm so upset.

I keep thinking about Kelly and how I never got to know her.

I feel so stupid worrying about my nonsense when all of this has happened.

My cousin's sisters' friend went missing for three days, out at a bar in Charlotte, the limping gazelle, found dead today. So horrible. And then, a soldier from Cabarrus County died in Iraq this week. It's a total cf of death and I can't take it.

WHERE ARE YOU GOD?

I believe in miracles and that God works in mysterious ways but I'm beginning to believe something else.

God is a lot more human than we would all like to think.

16 17 18

Here I stand on my two feet

With an orange and a white form in my sweaty palm.

The Orange form is for applying for a parking pass.

The White form is for applying for the PSAT in a week.

It's official.

I'm growing up...

Too fast.

So this is the new year.

This has been an interesting start to a school year.

For the first year ever, I got second chair in band.

I have a civics project to do, ALREADY!

I had a civics test yesterday, that I think I aced, despite everyone saying how hard it was.

I have quizzes literally everyday in biology, and there are 34 people in my class.

We looked at a flys leg up close under a microscope.

It made my soul scream.

Then my Algebra class is ridiculously obnoxious and loud, and the teacher can't call out on kids because she's just so passive, but that doesn't explain her extra earring on the top of her ear.

Oh, and she gives us quizzes on homework, so we will see how that went.

Drama club is interesting. New president and new student show director that is going to be watching me, judging me, eyeing me down during my audition which honestly makes me nervous because I am suckish at singing, but I'm going to attempt.

I'm running for treasurer of drama club, should be a shoe in.

Harris said, "just state your case if anyone asks."

And I said, "I have a calculator that is in functioning order."

And he said, "Perfect!"

Opus seems interesting.

ATON of people are doing this year.

Seriously, they didn't all fit in the classroom.

And Joanna and Sara are the editors so it should be really good.

Today was amazing.

I got my club approved.

I'm so excited.

speak! could be huge.

Oh yeah and auditions are next thursday and friday:D

I love my teachers for the most part. Somehow I'll balance all my activities with three honors classes and a social life, but for now... FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL:D