I'm single

But I don't want to be anymore.

Honestly.

I'm seriously lonely.

I can't take this anymore.

I want someone to hold.

I want someone who will make my heart race.

I want someone who I can love.

I'm not at all spiteful to those who are dating.

I'm happy for all my friends who are having their one years and one months.

I just need it back.

The feeling.

The excitement.

I'm starting to get back into the groove of where I am.

The hardest thing about breaking up for me, is that I lost sight of who I was.

You were told that you were amazing, wonderful, a flippin good kisser, a good boyfriend, hot, caring, there, kind, not like all the other boys, innocent.

I'm not hearing that anymore. I haven't heard it anymore, but that's okay.

I have fine self esteem. I know where I stand. I'm comfortable with who I am.

I think I look good, but sure, on early mornings, I look like hell, but who doesn't.

I don't miss compliments.

I miss the bond.

As the smiths said, if it's not love, it's the bond, the bond, the BOND that will keep us together.

My bond broke, basically.

Things are okay, but it isn't the same, and I'd be lying if I said it was.

We were best friends, but we aren't anymore.

Sometimes this fact makes me want to crawl under the covers, and not get out.

But that isn't right.

I still have friends.

Just no BEST friend.

But then again, everything is different.

My friends aren't who they were last year.

I always talked to you, but now you rarely say a word.

I'm not blaming anyone, I know, your busy.

School's hard. And you've gotta do well in it to get to go places in life,

But a simple hello wouldn't hurt.

I just try to be there, even though I never see these people anymore.

I can't wait until I can drive because then it'll be so much better.

I will get to drive to those parties.

See those people I don't normally see.

Visit a girlfriend maybe.

I don't know.

But I know that this feeling will grow.

And something will happen.

I know people.

I'm getting to know people.

I'm not crazy, I'm not loving them all.

I don't love any of them, not yet.

Tomorrow will provide answers.

But I'm tired of this feeling of an empty hard.

A dead feeling in my eyes.

I'm ready to feel my heart race.

And have one of those perfect nights.

And feel infinite.

Annoyances in my daily life.

Kids who can't go a sentence without saying a four letter

Girls who try to be LOL RANDOMMMM

Dumb people, and I'm not talking text books

Gum smackers

Silly Bands

People who blare bad music

People who talk about their parties, all the time

People who talk about their drinking experiences, all the time

People who talk about their sexual experiences, all the time

Middle Aged Christian Women who think THEY are right

People who are mean to gay people

PEOPLE WHO TALK LOUD TO FEEL AWESOME

Biology Class

Studying in general

People who disrespect teachers who are tremendously nice

Harry Potter Haters

Negative People

People who can't do this.....

(2X+3) (X+9)=

2X(sqd.) + 21X + 27 ... And are taking H. Algebra 2

Strict Parents

Jersey Shore

Douche Bags

Car Keys

.... and Cigarettes.

THIS IS IMPORTANT

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATH HALLOWS PT. 1 ON FRIDAY.

BE THERE, OR BE A MUGGLE!!!!!!

I'm a guy

Who sits in the front of the classroom, because he wants to

Who listens to peoples problems and helps the best I'm able to

Who isn't afraid to say I love you

Who cries sometimes and doesn't feel guilty for doing so

Who commits to relationships

Who doesn't go a day without listening to music

Who enjoys classic literature

Who was a loser in middle school

Who turned out okay

Who goes to parties for the people, not the drinks

Who doesn't kiss and tell

Who is starting to fear his feelings lately

Who doesn't do well in awkward situations

Who looks forwards to dates

Who finds beauty in tradition

Who has a passion for languages

Who wants to be successful

Who made a B

Who is okay with that

Who loved a girl

Who was involved in a serious relationship

Who opened up in many ways

Who still is a virgin

Who is planning on keeping it that way until I meet someone I really love

Who believes love derives far deeper than in my testosterone

Who hates people who expect me to talk to to them, when they don't talk to me

Who didn't talk to people when they were different around their friends

Who reads Mark Twain, Shakespeare, and Salinger because I love them

Who writes poetry

Who writes prose

Who writes plays

Who hasn't written anything in a long time

Who makes a mean mean mix CD

Who watches Skins religiously

Who hates that MTV is doing an american version of skins

Who is going to hate people that watch it

Who will love anyone that reads this blog and looks up skins on youtube

Who wants to study abroad in college

Who wants to go crazy in college

Who wants to lose control sometimes

Who wants to maintain stability, always

Who is a contra

Who is feeling alive again

Who is feeling love again

Who is missing everyone again

Who wants to be able to drive

Who wants to get his volvo

Who wants to have a best male and a best female friend

Who wants this semester to end, pronto

Who believes in the power of love

Who believes in the power of unity

Who believes in the power of humanity

Who honestly believes the world would be a far better place without religion

Who is Presbyterian, but can barely quote bible verses

Who yawns

Who coughs

Who enjoys hand holding

Who eats a lot

Who sleeps a lot

Who is sleepy now

Who is going to bed.

20 Bands to listen to when you're losing it.

20.) Animal Collective

19.) Cold War Kids

18.) Emery

17.) Tokyo Police Club

16.) Panic at the Disco

15.) The Avett Brothers

14.) Fleedwood Mac

13.) The Moody Blues

12.) Say Anything

11.) Belle and Sebastian

10.) Arcade Fire

9.) M83

8.) Blink 182

7.) Broken Family Band

6.) Bon Iver

5.) Owl City

4.) The Cure

3.) The Smiths

2.) Vampire Weekend

1.) Death Cab for Cutie

Just so you know

All guys to a degree are douches.

And on the flip side, all girls to a degree are bitches.

More guys are more regular douches.

Some guys are better at hiding their douchiness, until they get into a relationship.

No Guilt

I deserve this.

Plenty of time has gone by.

Despite your feelings now.

Despite everything...

I have to do what I want to do.

.............................................................

I'm sorry.

I hope you can be okay with this.

I hope you'll feel better.

I hope you won't spiral because of this.

But I can't feel guilty.

I guess you just now understand the gravity of this situation that we've been facing.

And you know, gravity pulls you down.

I hope you defy this gravity.

Because I care about you.

I really do.

I worked so hard, forreal

Band- A+

Civics- A-

Biology- B+

Algebra 2- A

Straight Superiors at NCTC at Jay M Robinson High School

Best Comedy at NCTC at Kings Mt. High School

p.s. I'm not bragging or trying to put anyone down, but if you had any idea what I went through this semester... and still got this, you would be astounded. But nobody can know what's going on with in me, because sometimes I barely know myself.